Friday, September 25, 2009

Five Fall Really Bad Ideas

1. Do not buy Halloween candy in September. Just because Target already has 4 aisles of Halloween candy, doesn't mean you have to fill your cart. It will be gone before October even starts no matter where you hide it. Pre-mature candy purchases leads to fat butts and tooth decay faster than you can say "fun size."


2. Don't put all your summer stuff away when school starts. If you do, the weather will surely get warm again and your kids will come home sweaty and grumpy and curse you for making them wear "too hot of stuff." I know it's a pain to keep 2 seasons out and accessible, but just do it.


3. Don't over volunteer. When you head to back to school night, only volunteer for one thing. I don't care if the sign up sheet looks all sad and empty and the teacher starts to cry. You will regret it. If you can't resist the urge to say "yes" when asked to do something, call me and I'll be your sponsor at "Volunteer's Anonymous" (something Jen & I made up last year--I swear I had to do an intervention with that chica at least once a week. Some of you are too good for your own good.). Don't think of it as saying no, think of it as you allowing other people to grow and gain blessings. Now that's unselfish.
4. Don't buy new school clothes just for the kids. Buy yourself a new "uniform." You know what I mean, that outfit that you throw on when you are too tired--too rushed--to bloated to put together an "ensemble." You're probably wearing it in your Costco photo. It's cute, it's comfortable, but your friends are sick of seeing you in it. Go to TJMax and splurge.

5. Don't forget to have some fun. Fall brings homework and lessons and sports and all sorts of other good things that can take over our lives and make us grumpy taskmasters. Screw soccer one Saturday and go pick apples (which really means go eat cider donuts & Cortlands dipped in caramel & peanuts); yank kids out early from school and go to the park with friends; ride bikes along the Charles before it's too cold; turn a blind eye and let the kids dig up part of the grass to make awesome mud and acorn pies.

7 comments:

Stefawn Von Gordon said...

Boooooo hoooooo!!!!! I want cider donuts and caramel apples!!!!! (sniffle sniffle)

Carly said...

I think my favorite line is "You're probably wearing it in your Costco photo." I laughed out loud in my office. So I just gave away the fact that while I am only "working" 6 hours a week in the office right now, I am not even doing real work that whole time.

Heather Parry said...

Yesterday I "splurged" on a new fall purse at Target. It is a cute little messenger-type bag made of adorable fabric. When I got home and looked at my receipt it says, "MISCELLANEOUS HOBO...$7.00." I laughed out loud. Apparently even my splurges are related to hobo-ism and only cost $7. Even the three bags of Halloween M&Ms I bought cost more than my new purse. :)

Anonymous said...

Love it!

aunt sue said...

So happy you're back!!!!

Dava said...

I'm so-o-o glad that I said 'No, thank you." to the principal who asked me to be PTA president!

and....I so very much agree with your priorities.

and...I miss those special times with my children and am so thankful that my children share their children with me when they can.

and...I, too, am SO-O-O-O-O-O glad you are back, Hed! xo

Dava said...

PS...oops...I had 3 pieces of candy corn before I read this...I had it stashed in the food storage room down in the basement and got it out to share with my grandaughter....I gotta go put it back...